Friday, May 9, 2008
Is It Just Me Or Is It Cold In Here?
I got my dress for the ACM Awards today! It is perfect, and seems to have been made just for me. I got it at Johnston's, and while we were there, Mason kept asking me for quarters. He had this tiny little purse-like thing that looked awfully cute, but I explained that we probably didn't need it. He kept begging for it, and insisting (loudly and frequently) that it's what he wanted to buy me for Mother's Day. Now that I look back on every scene from the trip involving Mason and the little purse, it seems the sales staff were all a bit uncomfortable about the whole thing. When he had escalated to the point of whining and rolling around on the floor (not quite) over buying the little purse for me, I finally stopped to check it out. I should have stopped sooner. While I don't know the exact name for the little items inside the cute little purse, suffice it to say if I got cold during the ACM Award show, those handy, adhesive, flower-shaped things would have prevented anyone else from knowing. And no - they weren't space heaters. Thank you, Mason, for another mortifying moment.
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Fun With Xanax
About 7 years ago, Blake and I planned a ski trip in Colorado. As we boarded the plane in Wichita, I got to our seats, made myself comfortable and then realized I was missing something. Blake. I excused me and pardoned me back out of the plane to find him just outside the entryway plastered against the wall. He said something to the effect of, "There's no way I'm getting on that deathtrap, tube of a coffin." We drove to Colorado.
Now that we've been invited to the Country Music Awards, Blake called the doctor for a refill of the Xanax he was given for the panic attacks he suffered from 7 years ago. He was encouraged to take one when we'd be around the house to make sure there were no strange effects, and that the drug would work properly. Here's where the fun begins.
Last night he took one pill at 5:15 pm and asked me to check with him in an hour. After about 30 minutes had passed, I asked him if he felt anything. He said he was fine, but felt like he was "Splurring his spleech." Hee Hee. After a full hour had passed the real fun began. Apparently the drug made him a little paranoid. He began to ramble about how stay at home housewives are the most likely to have internet affairs. I reminded him that he was completely welcome to dissect my computer at any time. He continued babbling about online dating, and said the strangest thing. He said, "Well how would you feel if I came home and said I was having a love affair with Keith Urban?" I cracked up! It made no sense, and I knew the drug was going to be just as fun for me as effective for Blake. Then he said that maybe the Xanax would give him the courage to talk to Martina McBride. But then he said, "I could remind her that the last time we were in the same room, she was wearing a cat suit." (There is some story about her working at a restaurant years ago at Halloween and Blake was there.) Whatever it means, I really hope that opportunity DOES NOT present itself.
It looks like the drug will do its job, and we should be boarding the plane together this time. I am also fairly certain that there will be several more bloggable moments as a result.
Oh - and this "free" trip isn't exactly remaining free. At last tally, we've spent $180,715.00! We had to use 90K frequent flyer miles which were rewarded on a dollar spent/mile earned basis. We got the last two seats on at least one leg, and with it being a last minute flight the rates were sky high. One of the side effects of the Xanax is increased risk taking. We went to Sheplers last night to look at boots, and somehow ended up with a pair costing more than my last Jag repair. Needless to say, I'll be looking for my dress at Goodwill!
Now that we've been invited to the Country Music Awards, Blake called the doctor for a refill of the Xanax he was given for the panic attacks he suffered from 7 years ago. He was encouraged to take one when we'd be around the house to make sure there were no strange effects, and that the drug would work properly. Here's where the fun begins.
Last night he took one pill at 5:15 pm and asked me to check with him in an hour. After about 30 minutes had passed, I asked him if he felt anything. He said he was fine, but felt like he was "Splurring his spleech." Hee Hee. After a full hour had passed the real fun began. Apparently the drug made him a little paranoid. He began to ramble about how stay at home housewives are the most likely to have internet affairs. I reminded him that he was completely welcome to dissect my computer at any time. He continued babbling about online dating, and said the strangest thing. He said, "Well how would you feel if I came home and said I was having a love affair with Keith Urban?" I cracked up! It made no sense, and I knew the drug was going to be just as fun for me as effective for Blake. Then he said that maybe the Xanax would give him the courage to talk to Martina McBride. But then he said, "I could remind her that the last time we were in the same room, she was wearing a cat suit." (There is some story about her working at a restaurant years ago at Halloween and Blake was there.) Whatever it means, I really hope that opportunity DOES NOT present itself.
It looks like the drug will do its job, and we should be boarding the plane together this time. I am also fairly certain that there will be several more bloggable moments as a result.
Oh - and this "free" trip isn't exactly remaining free. At last tally, we've spent $180,715.00! We had to use 90K frequent flyer miles which were rewarded on a dollar spent/mile earned basis. We got the last two seats on at least one leg, and with it being a last minute flight the rates were sky high. One of the side effects of the Xanax is increased risk taking. We went to Sheplers last night to look at boots, and somehow ended up with a pair costing more than my last Jag repair. Needless to say, I'll be looking for my dress at Goodwill!
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Monday, May 5, 2008
What Happens in Vegas
Blake and I are so excited! Last night we received an invitation to attend the Academy of Country Music Awards in Las Vegas in two weeks! Not only do we get to attend the TELEVISED awards show, we get to attend the New Artist Show and the after-party. I had serious trouble sleeping last night. We immediately went back on our diets full-force, planned our teeth bleaching schedule, tanning times and did a million google image searches on what to wear.
I was told that the women should wear cocktail dresses and the men generally wear Texas Tuxedos. I had to google that one. Turns out it's what I suspected - A tux top with jeans and boots. I always thought that look originated from my small, hometown prom, and it was because no one had enough money to rent the top AND bottom of the tux. Guess not. I should have known better since it's called the Texas Tux and not the Howard Tux. No matter - Blake's gonna look so hot. I've promised God that I'll honor my code of modesty, and wear something that covers my goods (right, Jana?)...but I do believe that God is OK with cute, so I'm excited to start shopping. Oh - maybe Sharon will let me borrow her Spanx...if she didn't ruin them by swimming in them! Ha!
We've heard that the after-party is fairly intimate, and it's likely we'll be elbow to elbow with the stars! We both admitted running through possible conversations and scenarios in our minds...and how horrible they kept turning out. Maybe we'll practice with each other. Blake can be Toby Keith and I'll be Carrie Underwood. That reminds me - I'm gonna have to keep my eye on Blake because he often refers to her as Carrie Underpants. I'd hate to have to kick her scrawny little...we're definitely going to get kicked out of the after-party.
One last thing - this morning I asked Blake if we'd gotten any great dresses in at the shop. We often do, and I can buy them directly from our customer. He said, "Yeah - one really cool one - but it's a size 1." I let an uncomfortable silence set in, and said, "You don't think I can wear a size 1?" And this is why I love this man - He quickly replied, "I figured you were at least a 2."
I was told that the women should wear cocktail dresses and the men generally wear Texas Tuxedos. I had to google that one. Turns out it's what I suspected - A tux top with jeans and boots. I always thought that look originated from my small, hometown prom, and it was because no one had enough money to rent the top AND bottom of the tux. Guess not. I should have known better since it's called the Texas Tux and not the Howard Tux. No matter - Blake's gonna look so hot. I've promised God that I'll honor my code of modesty, and wear something that covers my goods (right, Jana?)...but I do believe that God is OK with cute, so I'm excited to start shopping. Oh - maybe Sharon will let me borrow her Spanx...if she didn't ruin them by swimming in them! Ha!
We've heard that the after-party is fairly intimate, and it's likely we'll be elbow to elbow with the stars! We both admitted running through possible conversations and scenarios in our minds...and how horrible they kept turning out. Maybe we'll practice with each other. Blake can be Toby Keith and I'll be Carrie Underwood. That reminds me - I'm gonna have to keep my eye on Blake because he often refers to her as Carrie Underpants. I'd hate to have to kick her scrawny little...we're definitely going to get kicked out of the after-party.
One last thing - this morning I asked Blake if we'd gotten any great dresses in at the shop. We often do, and I can buy them directly from our customer. He said, "Yeah - one really cool one - but it's a size 1." I let an uncomfortable silence set in, and said, "You don't think I can wear a size 1?" And this is why I love this man - He quickly replied, "I figured you were at least a 2."
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